Egyptian Clowns

In another Blog the question „What is an Esoteric Order“ was asked. Well, regarding the GD as it is presented in the internet, I would have to say it is a group of people, dressing in fancy costumes, using funny tools, doing weird things. Members of such an Order are obviously nuts and need medical treatment.

That is the impression one may get reading what is out there. And I am not talking about the various forums as they are not the entry for anyone who is curious about the GD, I am talking (again) about the blogs and homepages. I first should say that I am not a member of any order or group but that I associate myself with the GD Tradition. I am trying my best working with what I have and get from the various books, blogs and forums. And I have to say there is a lot of valuable stuff there. The members of the forums obviously are having real and serious discussions about the Tradition, its content, the rituals and so on. But this is not what the average person “googeling” his or her way to the GD will find and see (or is willing to go through reading) first. The entry gate is the homepages and the blogs. And what do you see there? In a lot of them it seems that the battle between orders, groups and individuals is more important than the actual discussion about the Tradition and the work itself. The googler will read this and get the impression that the members of such orders are plain silly, vain and so on. And the googler will not see the difference between the orders and groups or understand what all that fuss is about. Instead the googler will go on and check on the videos and see some weird rituals performed by funny dressed people. Now, what will that person, even if he/she is interested in the search for the light and the Great Work think? Or people who are like, or are fans of, Dan Brown?

I say that specifically you heads and members of any ”official” orders and groups have a responsibility regarding how the GD is presented to the public because your blogs and homepages are (also) for the public, otherwise you could only use some closed forums. You represent the GD and its Tradition. You need to transport the spirit of the GD as a serious path to the light or enlightment if you allow me to phrase it this way. You are responsible for keeping any ridicule from the GD or else people will see this as an association of psychotic Egyptian like dressed clowns.

I love to read the blogs and forums and I do enjoy the videos which are out there. But I am devoted to the Tradition and I am interested in the GD and what it stands for, so I have a certain understanding of what is done in the videos any why it ids done that way. I am glad and thankful that I am able to see actual temple work since I am not able to attend a real temple. I learn so much from all of you but at the same time I realize that for someone else all this must look more than just weird.

You may think that I have not right to complain and how I could dare… since I am not part of the “official” GD, may not be experienced enough to understand and whatever else. You may be right. But as I said, I am regarding the GD and its tradition as highly valuable and too precious to just be seen as some more weird esoteric nonsense. I do not want to offend any individual, Order or group here or take anyone’s side. I value all of your work and appreciate the dedication you show in so many ways. I would just wish that you would see what the side effects of some of the published words may have.

In L.V.X

Arcad S.L.

Loosing The Days

Whow, it’s been a while since my last post. Matter of fact is that it is still very difficult for me to have enough alone time to prepare for, focus on, and then perform ritual work and keeping a routine in between juggling the family after coming home from work. Now I see how much time I wasted throughout my life when I had all the time in the world. I keep on advising people how important the daily routine is but then be not able to actually following my own words.
It may be just a question of will and focus or (maybe dedication?) but I doubt that. I wonder how people with small kids are able to keep their routine, I bet some do.
On the other hand, we are going through quite some trouble with other things, which also keeps us busy and exhausted.
I need to find a way to at least start with and maintain a weekly routine. So that is the plan. I also will try to perform some daily adorations which should be able to be performed anywhere in short time.
Once things settle a bit I hope to pick up my curriculum again.
Although I believe that even a tiny bit of ritual performed on a regular basis is helpful, one has to take care that this does not become an empty routine – quickly before going to bed…
I also hope that once I found the energy, time and focus to move my butt in that direction, I will be able to write more about my practical experience and struggles with that, as it was initially planed….

In L.V.X.
Fra. Arcad S.L.

Religion, Magick and Ignorance

I am amazed about the ignorance of people, in general and, in this case, specifically when it comes to Magick – and religion.

My interest in Magick does not come from a quest for a new, other religion. In that respect I am safe and happy in my beliefs. I am Christian, Lutheran, and I have no problem to also consider myself being a ceremonial magician. I am on a quest for the path to the Great Work. I do not see religion of any kind as a cage, something that should limit you. I am calling upon the divine names which were already well known and used by our ancient brothers and sisters of the old book. Why do so many Christians believe that anything connected to Magick (or in this respect, even Magic… I know…) should be against their religion. Reading the statements in various forums, specifically in “yahoo answers” (if you do not know that, just check it out, it is…well…, hilarious), it is obvious that most of these fine Christian kids have never bothered to even google or wikipedia about the subject. No one has even the slightest idea about what the Great Work is about. Instead I read about curses, spells, being doomed. Same goes for most of the Atheists in such forums. Tolerance? Ha. Personally I believe that religion is very individual, as individual as your path through life and your path to/through the Great Work if you choose to search for it. It is not important for anyone else but you. You have to be coherent, consistent with and within you. So if any beginners read this, do not let anyone tell you what you can do, what is allowed, what you can’t do any what is not allowed when it comes to the Great Work. A lot of the rituals do indeed contain elements which look like a contradiction to – in my case – Christianity. Calling upon Osiris? Ra? But you should know that these - in my case – do not represent the ancient Egypt gods in their clear ancient divine forms. They do represent other elements which are in consistence with my believes, the light, resurrection, love…. Of course you can see this different – in your case – if you want. What I am saying is that nothing is contradicting anything per se and that it is up to every individual to decide what can be included in his practice of both, religion and magic(k).

Who Is The Keeper of The Secrets?

I have to admit I may have been wrong. I was saying that that whole linage thing looks less important to someone outside the official system or someone who is just about to start working with the GD system. Now I was reading several blogs and indeed there is the question, who is in possession of the whole truth – or better the original, initial, primary GD knowledge. Are some of the “new” or more modern Groups and Orders able to lead you all the way through? Do the leaders actually have a legitimate background by having gone through the whole system themselves? I have to say that I find all of this very confusing. It is obvious that the tradition (whatever that may really be) has been further developed by various people and as long as all this is consistent and coherent in itself I do not see a problem with that. As much as it may be thrilling to be a part of an original, ancient tradition, it is the Great Work as such which counts and there are many paths. But still, reading who says what about whom and how much this one has no clue about the true symbolism behind this or that ritual remains being confusing. As someone who - at least for the time being – is depending on public sources, it would be nice to know that I can rely on the material at least to some extend.

Anyways, all this will not keep me away from doing my best in my devotion to the Great Work. Unfortunately I still get distracted a lot but I am demanding my time and hope to find more and more of a real daily routine…

Keeping the Routine

If you are not “forced” to attend a regular group meeting and thus have to maintain a certain routine and do some “homework”, it is difficult to fight every day’s distractions and keep a more or less strict schedule. Now I realize how much time I wasted while living alone, having all the time and opportunity to perform a daily routine. Living with a family, a new born, a 6 years old and of course partner, limits your free time and space – unless you have a huge house or farm maybe. A friend of mine let’s his kids participate in his performances letting them take the role of the angels during the LBRP, holding swords and so. This would distract me severely, I could not concentrate. So usually I am using late evenings or the night to perform some of my rituals. This of course means that I have to be reasonable. I can not vibrate the divine names the way I want to. I have tried various ways but the most effective for me includes some kind of volume (although I am not screaming). Chanting the names works but also then I would need some sound. So usually I am remaining rather quiet trying to vibrate the names more within, which seems to be a bit difficult for me.
The other problem is that yo need some preparation before the ritual but also some time afterwards. It makes no sense to just switch of the TV and start ritual and afterwards going back to the kitchen doing the dishes or just going to bed. Before the ritual you have to start to build up your concentration and focus by maybe a ritual cleaning or at least some meditation. After the ritual, you need some time to let the effects and the power of the ritual settle within you. After this you should make your journal entry and then maybe another moment of silence and peace before going to bed. In my case, before the ritual is baby feeding and afterwards preparing milk or other stuff for the night. Now you say so do that stuff first and then work afterwards. But I better use the time when I have it. I can prepare milk when I am holding a just woken up crying baby. I can not perform a ritual holding the baby in my arms at the same time. And the mother? Well, she deserves her night’s sleep since she is getting up during nights (me working full time), so she can’t help. Additionally she is not that supportive of my “Abrakadabra” or Hokuspokus” stuff. She is tolerating it but not really supportive.
Since I am not an early morning person and since my night’s sleep is limited anyways, working before everyone is awake is not an option either. This way, I cherish the time alone at home during days when everyone else is gone.
Obviously the office is a bad place too – although I have performed some daily solar adorations in the morning and at noon now and then.

Sometimes a solitary practitioner really needs to be solitary….

Introduction

I start this blog to write about my work and efforts as a Solitary Self Initiating Magus in the Golden Dawn Tradition. This will not be a full diary or journal but I want to use this to write about my experiences, efforts and struggling as well as to straighten out my thoughts. I also hope to receive assistance from fellow sisters and brothers in the Great Work within and outside of any lodges and orders. I have seen quite some great sites which offered advise and so I hope that these offers were not just empty words.

I have chosen to be a solitary practitioner mainly because of a lack of choice. There is no real near by temple of the Golden Dawn I could join and although I would have preferred to work within a group, it seems that I have to stick to myself. I am having friends on the same path and so I am not without any company there. However, I hope to find some more company here.

I have been studying the Great Mysteries for a while now. I have read a lot and I also have taken some online courses. I am serious in my devotion for the Great Work. I am not a Thelemite although I include some of the Thelemite rituals and of course texts into my work. However, I focus on the Golden Dawn tradition because first, it seems that most systems are at least to some extend based on the Golden Dawn teachings and second because the GD teachings appeal to me most. Therefore I truly regret that I have to work solitary. This also alowes me to go on my own pace because right now, family and professional obligations take a great deal of my time and I do indeed find it difficult to maintain a daily routine.

May I be allowed to leave some words about the war between the GD orders and the question of linage. From an outfielder’s perspective this seems to be a useless war, a waste of time and energy. In one post somewhere I read that the seeking student obviously would be looking for the true, the original GD. Well in a way this is true. I do not want any kind of a pseudo GD group which is only using the GD label to make money but not offering any true, serious, real content. But then every serious seeker should be able to judge about the quality of the offer he is looking at. If someone believes that he/she can buy the GD wisdom for only 99.99 including a special offer for eternal life if you order now, well then maybe he/she does not deserve better. However, it is obvious that in our modern time, also the occult and esoteric studies are by fact business. So all this fighting about linage and being the true and real, original and therefore better order looks – to the outsider – also like a fight about shares of the esoteric market. As far as I am concerned, I am indeed confused about this because I would not know how to judge here. The wording used by not only one side here, just the way things are phrased, – can set of people. One should think that within the esoteric community in general but certainly between the same minded groups, tolerance should be more common than amongst other people, not only because we have to deal with a lot of intolerance. The opposite seems to be the case. The fight about the possession of the real and final truth is omnipresent. Finally, and again from my point of view as an outsider, all the involved orders/groups have some legitimate linage. At the end of the day, all go back to the same roots, the original founders. Just that the split created different arms of the same tree. For me it is even difficult to see the difference in the teachings. I am sure there are some, but I do not know how vital they are. I am not sure that they are as vital as for example in Christianity, where it may make a bigger difference whether you believe that the bread and wine are actually transforming into the true and real flesh and blood of Christ or just representing blood and flesh. Or the question whether your true and honest faith in Jesus is already bringing salvation or whether you are already are doomed by the sole fact of being born and need to performs as many good acts as possible to be able to only hope for salvation. That fact is, most people do not really care about some of these differences and other’s are weirded out by it.

Unity? I am not qualified to advise on this. But one thought I may be allowed to mention: I assume that there can be no unity in the way of being under one roof with one chief. Such an idea seems to be rather illusionary. What about one roof but remaining with the individual orders/groups maybe with a synod held on regular occasions attended by the chiefs discussing the differences and finding compromises, agreements or whatever. At the end of the day and at the very least there should be a peaceful co-existence since indeed you (and we non organized self initiated (non-members)) are all sisters and brothers in the same aim and in the same tradition!

in L.V.X.
Fra. Arcad - S.L.